I figure before I can come up with some sort of magic solution, I need to have a good idea of what's going wrong and what our limitations are. It's all very well and good to say I want a sparkling clean house, dinner on the table each night at six, and kids who go to bed promptly at 8 pm, but short of hiring someone to come over each evening to cook, clean, and put the kids to bed, I doubt that's going to happen. Because when I get home from work...I am DONE. Gone are the days of some kind of delicious three-course meal ready by six each night. These days it's amazing we eat at all.
The trouble around here can be lumped into two main categories, I think: lack of time, and lack of structure. We all fall apart without structure and routine governing basic "household upkeep" related activities, and my own busy schedule keeps me feeling like I'm in the center of a tornado. I'll outline a typical day for us, and maybe with everything spelled out it'll be easier to identify what needs to be worked on first.
6:00 am: First alarm goes off. I wake up, look at the time, mutter "You've got to be kidding me," and go back to sleep.
6:30 am: Second alarm goes off. I pry myself out of bed and over to the coffeemaker, then sit down at the computer.
6:45 am: Third alarm goes off...shower time.
7:30 am: I am dressed and ready. Time to wake up kids.
7:40 am: 2nd attempt at waking up kids. One or two might be awake. Nobody is dressed.
7:45 am: Someone decides now is a good time to inform me they have no clean socks.
7:50 am: Chris is still in pajamas, yelling something about looking for pants while playing with legos.
8:00 am: Erin eats breakfast, I run around looking for shoes and backpacks while yelling to Chris that if he doesn't hurry up and find a shirt, he'll be grounded for a month.
8:10 am: Get everyone herded out the door and into the car.
8:15 am: Drop the boys off close to school for them to walk the final block or so (their school doesn't open till 8:20). Discover one of the boys is missing backpack/jacket/homework/other needed item.
8:25 am: Arrive at work, park, dash inside in time to clock in just before the bell rings and the students line up.
8:30 am - 2:30 pm: Work
2:30 pm: Lunch break. Drive home for 20 minutes and then drive to pick up boys from school, then go back to work with them.
3:30 pm - 5:30 pm: Work. Kids do homework (hopefully).
5:45ish - 9ish: Arrive home and try to fend off hungry children long enough to get something fixed for dinner. Eat, kids play/argue while I do my best to get some "me" time.
9:00 pm: Realize it's 9 and nobody is in pajamas. Tell whoever is due for a bath to get in the tub or shower. Get the others to put on pajamas and read in bed.
9:30 pm: Tell them they had REALLY get pajamas on or else (insert empty threat here).
10:00 pm: Erin falls asleep reading in bed. At this point I am usually informed somebody doesn't have clean pajamas/sheets/insert item needed for bedtime here.
11:00 pm: Even though they've been in bed for an hour, boys are still talking/playing. Call one out to sit in hallway doing nothing while the other one falls asleep.
11:30 or midnight: FINALLY. Peace and quiet. I go to bed.
So it looks like there's a whole lot of nothing going on around here in the evenings, and that's when it'd be best to do things like pick up, get clothes laid out, etc.--all the things normal people in organized homes do, no doubt. Except that's the time that we all seem to shut down around here. Trying to get the kids to pick anything up in the evening is even more like pulling teeth than it is on weekends, and I can't be bothered to so much as rinse off dinner dishes, let alone do laundry or actually wash any dishes, or get on the kids to do something useful. Like I said earlier--I am DONE. I need someone to come in and run the evening routine for me...or else I need some magic way to get an entire evening's routine done in ten minutes, because I think that's all the four of us can handle. Some kind of sleeping potion that will knock the kids out around 8:30 pm would be nice, too. And a winning lottery ticket couldn't hurt, as long as I'm living in Dreamland here.
So there's the problem: how to maintain organization in a house where everyone has ADD, I don't have enough time, and there's no backup. If I have any kind of follow-through (which is a coin toss), I'll post what will likely be a string of failed attempts at bringing some kind of order into our evenings. That'd probably be more interesting to read than a solution to the madness, anyway...
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1 comment:
So I have some experience being a single working Mother, you may or may not have heard.
This is how I do it:
Morning, I wake up the kids at 7:30 they have to get dressed right before they leave their room. I make them breakfast while they dress and leave it on the table, all the while yelling at them that their cereal is getting soggy or their waffles are getting cold. They come eat, clear their setting and go brush their teeth and hair. Shoes and jackets go in the same place everyday. If I don't see them in their spot, I stop everything until the shoes are where they go. This eliminates the lost shoes issue.
Night: as soon as you walk in the door, the kids with homework have to sit down and start their homework. Homework should be done in sight of you, at the table perhaps so to keep the talking and playing to a minium. Who ever does not have homework must go to their room and be play quietly. (You could assign cleaning time to the non-homework having child here)This would allow you time to prepare some sort of meal. Everyone comes together to eat dinner, once ready. When finished eating everyone clears their own setting then continues with the previous activity. (Homework or reading or even bath time at this point)While they are finishing homework and starting baths, you can do dishes and basic wipedown.
As they finish home work they should get into the shower and PJ's after. Then to bed for reading. I do the EXACT same thing every morning, and every night without fail, I have even asked them to say out loud to me exactly what they are to do and in what order, followed by the order to get it done.
Laundry and grocery shopping is done on weekends, normally Sunday. Cleaning the kids room is fairly easy because we don't play with toys very many toys during the week and what is played with is put away before getting into bed. The major cleaning, honestly doesn't happen very often, but I have to plan for it when it does happen.
Good luck :)
Heather (your sounding more organized then I actually could ever be) Sister in Law
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