Let them eat...toothpaste.

We had our third dentist visit in two months today. Before dental insurance kicked in, Brian needed an emergency extraction, to the tune of $356.00. After we had insurance, I took the kids in for cleanings, sealants, x-rays, etc...catching up on several years of skipped dental checkups. That set me back another $250, although considering the total cost was over $1200, I suppose I got a bargain. Then, today, Brian and Erin went back for a couple of fillings each. Another $291--and that's the 20% copay. And it's still not over. Erin couldn't sit for quite as long as it would have taken to do everything, so she still needs to come back for one last filling.

Somehow, Chris has managed to eat the same foods and follow the same tooth-brushing regimen as the other two, and has been cavity-free his whole life. (After today's dental bill, this totally elevates him to Favorite Child status, for at least the next day or so.) Brian and Erin are either sneaking soda and candy in the middle of the night or have inherited bad genes. Clearly from their other parent, of course--and that's not my typical blame-shifting-out-of-convenience talking. I was cavity-free until I started running a candy store out of my backpack in middle school.

So, since ensuring the kids all eat healthy food, brush after meals, refrain from soda and other sugary foods, etc. doesn't seem to be enough to keep me from dropping nearly a thousand dollars on dental bills...it looks like the kids will be starting a new, all-toothpaste diet. At least toothpaste, of all things, won't rot their teeth. Right?

Sigh.

Actually, I think she's got the right idea here

I hadn't even gotten to our fraction lesson yesterday (math is our first subject) when Ms. Marilyn, Erin's pre-K teacher, stepped in to ask if she could have a word. I'm used to getting these kinds of interruptions in the afternoon, during the after-school care portion of the day. Erin seems to do a lot of things that need to be mentioned to me. ;) So my first thought was to wonder what on earth had gone so wrong that Erin hadn't lasted fifteen minutes into her morning recess. Thankfully, it seemed to be one of those "I just can't wait till later to tell you this" kind of stories.

It seems Erin carries on a lot about Christian, her boyfriend (the one who inspired The Drawing all those months ago), and how she is going to marry him. So much that Ms. Marilyn had to inform her that four- and five-year-olds do NOT have boyfriends and do NOT speak about getting married. Yesterday's talk was prompted, apparently, by Erin screaming at Christian, "FINE! IF YOU WON'T MARRY ME, I WON'T DO ANYTHING FOR YOU!" and then stomping off, refusing to play with him. But you know--she's kinda on to something there, isn't she? Cue Beyonce. ;)

Why I don't like shopping

I've got to hand it to Erin. Now that I'm on my third child--and considering the three I have--there really aren't many things the kids can pull that someone hasn't done to me before. Erin managed to find one such thing today.

We found ourselves at Best Buy tonight, due to a lack of computer paper on which to print Brian's book report that is due tomorrow, and a lack of other open stores. Stores like Best Buy are usually on my "do not enter under any circumstances" list if I have the kids with me, since it's usually impossible for me to get to where I need to go and then back out again without losing a kid or two to the big-screen TV section or the video game displays. I felt proud, then, to note that we made it all the way to the checkout line without incident.

And then it happened. Erin let go of my hand...backed up...and when I motioned for her to come back, yelled at the top of her lungs, "I DO NOT LIVE WITH YOU!"

I managed to wrangle her back over to me, dragged her up to the checkout counter with our computer paper, at which point the checkout girl asked Erin why she looks so much like me if she doesn't live with me. (Thank GOODNESS for that, lol. Had Mr. I-Inherited-Every-Recessive-Gene, Brian, pulled this stunt, I'd probably be in a squad car right about now.) Erin glared at her, wrenched herself out of my grip, ran to the middle of the giant world map painted on the floor at the store entrance, stood with her hands on her hips, and yelled again, "I DO NOT LIVE WITH YOU! I AM NOT GOING WITH YOU!"

Brian and Chris shrugged and suggested that we should go home without her, looking all too happy with that idea. I ran down Erin, grabbed her, and started toward the door. She fought me the whole way, still yelling "LET GO OF ME! I DO NOT LIVE WITH YOU! I AM NOT ERIN! I DO NOT LIVE IN YOUR HOUSE!" She kept yelling that all the way to the car, at which point she insisted she lives in Wonderland, is only in California on a visit, has no family because they all died, is the boss of herself, will not be attending school anymore, and doesn't need birthday presents from me because all her friends will be happy to give them to her at Wonderland.

She kept that up all the way home, up to the front door, fighting and yelling that she doesn't live here...until I announced that everyone who lives with me was about to get ice cream for dessert. At that point, she decided she was here for a vacation.

We will not be returning to Best Buy in the foreseeable future. I'm pretty sure they have a good view of the whole thing on their security tapes...I don't know that I'm all that eager to give them a repeat performance.

Too S-M-A-R-T for her own G-O-O-D

Brian: "Mom, when is S-U-P-E-R-N-A-N-N-Y on?"

Erin: "Supernanny?"

Brian: "Ugh."

Me: "Hey, I *told* you she could spell."

I don't know whether he didn't want Erin to get interested in tv, or if he just likes having secrets, lol, but those days are over now. ;)

Praise where praise is due

Please excuse this interruption...

I know most of these posts are about the craziness that goes on here, since that's what's entertaining (and what I'm going to want to look back on and laugh about years later), but I need to take a minute to give a very big WAY TO GO to the boys. The school I teach at does not have a spring break, and I can't very well take a week off from work, nor could I afford to send them to the YMCA for the week. They spent their entire week off from school in my classroom--and they were absolute angels the whole time. Obviously, spending a week off from their second and third grade classrooms in their mother's second and third grade combination class was NOT their idea of a fun time, but they handled it better than I dared to hope. When my students did activities and hands-on lessons, they participated. When my students did textbook work, they read quietly. When my students took a science test...they both opted to take the test too, just to see how they'd do!

I did bribe them with the promise of seeing Monsters vs Aliens if they were good all week (we go to the movie theater about twice a year, since it's not really in the budget, so that was a big deal for them) and I planned as many hands-on things they could participate in as possible, but they definitely had plenty of chances to make their unhappiness known if they had so chosen. Instead, they acted like model students and genuinely enjoyed themselves (on a scale of 1 to 10, Brian gave the week a 7, so I was pretty impressed). The Adderall helps, but it only goes so far--so I am VERY proud of them and we thoroughly enjoyed the movie this morning. :)

And now, back to your previously scheduled accounts of mischievousness and sibling rivalry. ;)

Things I never thought I'd hear myself say, #837

"I don't care if your skin DOES glow in the dark. You cover it up with a blanket and you go to sleep! RIGHT THIS MINUTE!"

This is how it all starts, isn't it? The superhero business, that is. One minute you're playing with a glow stick you got in an Easter party goody bag, the next minute you find it's sprung a leak and you've got yellow glowy liquid dripping onto your stomach...next thing you know...you are THE INCREDIBLE GLOWING BOY! Delighted in your newfound powers, you rub the leaking glow stick over your arms, legs, and hands. Streaks of yellow glow-in-the-dark goo illuminate the night. THE DARKNESS WILL BE CONQUERED AT LAST.

At least, until your mom comes in to ruin it all. And then doesn't even let you wash it off. Oh, well...every superhero needs an archenemy to plot against.

They call him "Slick."

Or at least, maybe he wants them to.

Mother of the Year that I am, I managed to forget that today was Picture Day, despite the deluge of flyers and reminder notices the boys' school has been sending home. The boys got out of bed a few minutes late today, and so they pretty much had to throw some clothes on and get in the car, disheveled hair and all. I was feeling pretty proud of myself for getting them there only 15 minutes after they'd woken up, in time for them to eat breakfast in the cafeteria and everything. Until I saw the sign and realized they were about to have their picture taken with messed-up hair and old t-shirts.

When I picked them up, I apologized profusely, and told Chris that maybe his picture would still be okay, since he was wearing a Spiderman t-shirt and he likes Spiderman. He said, "Actually, I kept my jacket on. Oh, and Mom, I lucked out. I was still all sweaty from recess, so I could slick my hair back."

Looks like I'll be saving myself $45 at picture-ordering time. Actually...maybe I should buy them. Pictures of a sweaty-haired, jacket-wearing second grader with "fangs" (he's lost some teeth lately) might have a pretty high entertainment value.